Category Archives: Books

Bloom Where You’re Planted

Author Claire Cook considers herself a late-bloomer having published her first novel in her mid-forties. I knew of Claire’s work because I read the second book she wrote, Must Love Dogs and then picked up a copy of every book that followed.

Years later I met Claire online on the Goodread.com website. Our conversation started after Claire visited my online journal and read some of my writing. At the time I had just written “I Forgot that Sunflower’s Die,” which was just a few lines that touched upon the death of my daughter’s father. Claire had also lost a parent as a child and she shared her story which had recently been published in Good Housekeeping magazine.

Since then Claire’s periodically sends a note cheering on my writing, and with each book she writes I’m reminded that it’s never to late to follow your heart.

Whether you find yourself writing at a child’s swim practice or in the humid, hum of a bustling laundry mat, remember to love what you have and to bloom where your planted.

Here is Claire Cook’s interview on the Today Show…well done, girl:)

well

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New Moon 2009, Twilight Series Trailer

For all you Twilight fans…

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The Last Day of School

Yesterday was Alexa’s last day of school. It was a bittersweet day that Alexa both looked forward to and dreaded.

When Alexa’s Dad died 2 years ago she wrote and read a tribute at his funeral, a good-bye letter if you will. In her letter she said that she feared the big days ahead, like graduation and someday getting married. She said that the milestones in her life would be marked by his absence.

Alexa made it clear to me that she would not walk in a graduation ceremony afraid she’d be reduced to tears and throughout her last year of high school I wondered if she’d graduate at all. She struggled with chronic illness related immune deficiency and she grieved over lost health and a lost father. Her grades fell.

Her greif counselor told me not to push her and sometimes I didn’t, and sometimes I did. I knew if Alexa didn’t graduate that she was still an able, capable girl, even more important Alexa knows she’s an able capable girl. But I was afraid if she gave up on graduation that it would give her more of a reason to give up on life. Alexa and I discussed our terms, she agreed to follow through with earning the credit needed to graduate and only said, “just stay with me,” and so I did.

Finishing class yesterday reminded her that she couldn’t call her Dad to say, ” I did it Dad,” but she imagined what he might  have said and how proud of her he would have been.

After her online classes ended at noon we loaded into the car and left for the suburbs of Minneapolis. Nick had a new car to pick up and Alexa and I made plans to visit Cookie Strange at Great Clips in Champlin.

Cookie is one of my closest friends, daughter. I’ve known Cookie ever since she was born and her Mother named her Emily…which she later changed to Cookie. Cookie works magic on hair and I will follow her to the end of the earth because she makes my hair fabulous.

The last time I got my haircut I had it done locally, it is viewable in all of my online photos. The cut was alright but it wasn’t the kind of cut that you could blow dry and go and it didn’t fare well on windy days in the garden. I need hair that you can seriously mess up and I prefer an modern edge because age appropriate just sucks,  as always Cookie delivered.

When Alexa and I finished getting our hair cut we went to Totally Tan. As Alexa’s health has worsened her skin color has become very light but her hair is dark. During the summer she frequently hides in jeans feeling like her legs glow white. She also burns easily so I agreed to take her to a place that offers a full body spray tan.

After I paid for Alexa’s tan, Alexa looked at me and said…”Aren’t you going to go?” I hesitated, I have  to attend a birthday party and a wedding today…but thought I could use some color. After asking a pile of questions I decided to try it. The experience was absolutely dreadful, it so cold it almost took my breath away and I forgot to use the shower cap so I stepped out once again feeling like Bridget Jones.

On the drive home Alexa and I talked about her Dad, upcoming graduation parties, what to wear to the wedding and we started to turn a warm brown …maybe not so bad. By this morning I staggered to the kitchen for coffee on gingerbread colored legs and thought; definitely not bad.

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On a Beautiful Day

Charles Dickens
Image via Wikipedia

The weather is perfect today and I plan to spend most of the day outdoors. First I need a very long walk because I committed a cardinal sin and ate 4 ice cream sandwiches in 24 hours, suffice it to say  that I refused to visit the scale this morning choosing to ignore her instead. After that there is garden work that needs to be done and sheets that I want to hang outdoors to dry. I plan to accomplish all of this with my MP3 player.

As I am typing this blog post my computer is transfering 33 hours of Charles Dickens, 7.5 hours of Claire Cook, 8 hours of E. Lockhart and the final chapters of Sinclair Lewis. Titles include Little Dorrit, Wildwater Walking Club, The Disreptuble History of Frankie Landau Banks and the the last chapters of Main Street. My favorite way to spend a day…is lost in a book!

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Conversation Primer

Pontiac Vibe
Image by im4t00l via Flickr

Why do guys think I need help in the automotive department? Seriously, do I look in the least bit lost or confused? If its just an excuse to talk to me, I don’t mind but let me give you a hint…if you’d like to get to know me don’t begin your conversation with me by insulting my intelligence.

Oh and as far as the “didn’t know girls knew much about small gas engines…” comment.  I’m no expert but I’m pretty sure I have a small gas engine on my lawn mower, snow blower and dirt bike, not in my Pontiac Vibe.

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A Riding Vacuum Cleaner:)

Henry Hoover playing hide and seek
Image by itspaulkelly via Flickr

Today was a shopping day which included the purchase of a new vacuum cleaner. I procrastinate these kinds of purchases because I hate spending over 200.00 on an item that isn’t in anyway fun. For that kind of money I could buy an iPod Touch or one of those under the cupboard television sets with the screen that flips down; you know fun. I planned to purchase one last year but didn’t which meant that buying one this year was a must.

Since I wasn’t going to get anything remotely entertaining I picked a Hoover WindTunnel vacuum cleaner. This particular model was the small canister type that I could use on carpet or wood floors but the real clincher to the deal was that it looked like I could sit on it and scoot from room to room if I was so inclined. This made the Hoover WindTunnel the perfect choice  because the  purchase was both functional and fun (wink).

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Baking, Santana & Chad Kroeger

Baking artisan bread to Santana & Chad Kroeger.

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OpenZine

I’ve been playing around with a variety of online publications for a project I’ve been thinking about launching. Among the websites offering e-newsletter I found OpenZine, a site where you can publish your own online magazine.  I’m not sure how well OpenZine will work for the project I have in mind but I decided to check it out because I was curious.

The cover of this particular issue relates to my online website, http://www.madelinewest.biz  but I thought Lost Marbles reader might enjoy the content and also the introduction to OpenZine website.Madeline West Click the magazine cover to view.

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The Familial Scattering of Statelessness

1915-1949 and Beyond

Open Wound : The Genocide of German Ethnic Minorities in Russia and the Soviet Union: 1915-1949 and Beyond by Samuel Sinner

Periodically I do research on my family history. With the explosion of the internet each year I gain increasing access to information regarding the Volga German colony in Russia where my grandmother was born.

Yesterday I discovered a vast wealth of information at the The Center for Volga German Studies website at Concordia University in Portland, Oregon. I clicked links and read detailed historical accounts of family history and found a request for Volga German descendants to contribute photos and artifacts to preserve what little remained of the 200 year Germanic history in Russia.

I contacted the professor and sent an MP3 file of a song written for my Volga German grandmother by Minnesota Public Radio host Jeff Horwich, after she made history becoming the second oldest person in the United States to obtain citizenship, she was 106.

The reply to my email was almost immediate, the Center for Volga German studies was thrilled to have the clip and asked for history and photos to feature my, now 108 year old grandmother, on their website.

I was very pleased to have a few items to contribute and will discuss sending additional items for historic preservation. Like my relatives and the Volga German language much of my family and our heritage has been extinguished. I grew up feeling the vacancies that I imagine children and grandchildren of refugees feel yet we look so American. It seems easier to grasp an individuals sense of displacement when the individual looks displaced but Volga Germans looked like any other American.  Yet our photos were only those from America and our belongings were American, we have almost no family articles prior to our migration to the U.S.. My grandfathers home and blacksmith shop was seized by the Russian government along with everything he owned, many colonies were burned to the ground and communities were savagely murdered. All that remains is my grandmother’s childhood shawl, a couple of pictures and horrific tales of the brutality endured by members of my family.

We are not Jewish Holocaust survivors yet our lives are marked by genocide. We are not Palestinian yet we too are refugees who are affronted by that which was wrongfully taken and we intimately understand the familial scattering of statelessness.

As a child I felt what was missing, as an adult I understood why.

– Jody

P. S. Upon contacting the Center for Volga German Studies the professor, knowning nothing more than my grandmothers family name, was able to accurately place us in the colony of Germans in Deitel. I was also able to find documents that traced our family history back to the 1600’s in Germany. Today, descendants of Volga German refugees are eligible for German citizenship under German “right of return” laws.

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Gladwell and the Influence of Personal Passion

In his book Outliers Malcolm Gladwell discusses the significance of the 10k Hour Rule which introduced the notion that among the keys to becoming extraordinarily successful in a field is the requirement of approximately 10k hours of practice. Gladwell’s theory is based in part on research by Anders Ericsson who in the early 1990s studied violinists at the Berlin Academy of Music. In his book Gladwell asserts the following:

“The curious thing about Ericsson’s study is that he and his colleagues couldn’t find any “naturals” – musicians who could float effortlessly to the top while practicing a fraction of the time that their peers did. Nor could they find “grinds”, people who worked harder than everyone else and yet just didn’t have what it takes to break into the top ranks. Their research suggested that once you have enough ability to get into a top music school, the thing that distinguishes one performer from another is how hard he or she works. That’s it. What’s more, the people at the very top don’t just work much harder than everyone else. They work much, much harder.”

In his book Gladwell reviews a select number of individual who achieved extraordinary success by putting in their 10k hours. But there is another commonality that emerges among his examples…they are all personally driven to put in their 10k hours. The Beatles Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Bill Joy were all to varying degrees obsessed as though they had an internal need. My question is, would success have come to Bill Joy if he lacked the personal drive yet put in his 10k hours because his father insisted he learn and master computer programming? While 10k hours may be the magic number, is personal drive and passion also a necessary part of the Outliers formula?

As a young mother my 4 year old son insisted that he could be an actor so when an open audition came up in Minneapolis with a well known agency I took him believing that it would be a good learning experience…success doesn’t come overnight and acting takes hard work.

Parents weren’t allowed to watch the auditions, my son was lead into a room where he met agents and was rated on a scale for one to ten. The agency called later to say that Nick scored a perfect 10, that they not only wanted to sign him but that they also wanted to send him on an audition for Target the following day. I naturally verified that they didn’t have my son confused with someone else because he wasn’t notorious for being cooperative in preschool.

Nick and I went to the audition and I received a call that evening, Target wanted to sign Nick for their Christmas advertisement. Since they used the word advertisement I assumed he was doing print work, when I discussed signing Target contracts I discovered that Target had hired him for a television commercial. To recap, within 2 weeks of Nick’s audition he was on a set filming his first television commercial, by 5 he was a member of AFTRA and had his own medical and dental policy through the actors union. Nicholas went on to do oodles of print work, and a long list of television commercials including a McDonald’s Christmas commercial which aired for several years world wide and an ABC mini series. I eventually withdrew the boys from acting because of health complications.

The point of my story is that The Beatles, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Bill Joy and even my 4 year old son all shared a passion, a drive…and what appears to me to be an inner knowing of where in the universe they naturally fit best.

While Gladwell discusses the Matthew effect in Outliers, I’d like to introduces my own biblically inspired theory which I will call: many are called but few are chosen. Maybe Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and Bill Joy were obsessed because their obsession was exactly where they belonged and they had an innate understanding of that fact just like my son did…maybe passion and obsession are intertwined with the personal destiny of certain individuals. Maybe Gates, Jobs, and Joy were the “chosen” referred to in the biblical text and maybe still others are merely “called,” meaning they lack a specific passion or drive and therefore are not destine to achieve an Outliers spectacular level of success.

While I have no disagreement with the 10k Hour Rule I do wonder if personal drive isn’t a necessary part of the equation. Are we assuming that an uninterested violinist may achieve an Outliers success with the right factors by merely completing of their 10k hours? Or do uninterested violinists quit playing because the volume of time needed is drudgery when you lack the drive, love and passion for the pursuit …THEREFORE those individuals did not end up represented in Anders Ericsson’s research because they stopped playing.

Gladwell again raises fascinating questions regarding our assumptions about the road to success. He suggests that a part of the formula may very well be a quantifiable amount of practice. I would seriously caution parents against making a child practice more rigorously in hopes of inducing an Outlier but I would encourage parents to pay careful attention to those things their children are passionately interested in and remember the 10k Hour Rule when worrying whether or not Johnny is spending too much time doing…X. In the cases of Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, The Beatles and Bill Joy that obsessive dedication factored into their ultimate success.

* On a side note, I think many people have passion and drive but we’re often taught that this factor is unimportant. We see growing up and maturing as putting away childish dreams and notions…like being a television actor.  Had I not taken Nick on that audition, he may have never had the opportunity to prove me wrong. My motive was to help him gain insight into the world, that could have been a spirit squelching dose realism. Nick taught me to believe in the wisdom of the spirit. Author Paulo Coelho once wrote “When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true.”  Sometimes it does.

***On a quirky side note, I looked up Malcolm Gladwell’s biography and discover that he and I share the same birthday also, when I selected a fictional town name for a novel I’m working on I picked Elmira, thinking that I sort of made it up. Elmira is where Malcolm Gladwell grew up, just thought it was an interesting coincidence.

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